***(Editor’s Note: Leading up to Inauguration Day on January 20th, “The Thirsty Quill” is publishing a series entitled “Ranking The Presidents.” There is no ‘exact science’ to these rankings other than personal opinion based on such factors as policy, performance, popularity, perseverance, integrity, and legacy. Aside from those Presidents ranked in the top 25% and the bottom 25%, there is a great deal of ‘wiggle room’ for discretionary placement and movement. These rankings are strictly the personal opinion of the Editor of ‘The Quill,’ and should not be regarded as an academic survey of any type. Debate of these rankings is highly encouraged and appreciated.)***

#43*: William Henry Harrison (March 1841-April 1841)

Unfortunately, someone had to be at the bottom. This ‘ranking’ is more of a somber assignment than a disgraceful selection for Harrison. He, of course, was the President who had the undeserved bad luck of catching an illness while delivering his inauguration speech in 1841…or so the story goes. Most scholars and historians discredit that theory as the lone cause of the pneumonia that developed shortly thereafter. The illness led to a premature death only a few weeks later. Considering the fact that Harrison spent about a month in the Presidency, and coupled with the fact that his influence and ability to perform were squandered by his short tenure, it is unfair to officially rank him on this list. Any type of rating (either positive or negative) would be based on mere assumption, and doing so without merit and supporting evidence would be reckless at best. Therefore, Harrison lands here at #43…but with an appropriate asterisk by his name to remove him from culpability in the cellar.

Notable Quotations: “Power is insinuating. Few men are satisfied with less power than they are able to procure. No lover is ever satisfied with the first smile of his mistress.”

“Conscience is that magistrate of God in the human heart whose still small voice the loudest revelry cannot drown.”

Famous Slogan/Phrase Associated With Harrison: “Tippecanoe and Tyler too,” referring to Harrison as the hero of the Battle of Tippecanoe against American Indians in 1811, and his Vice Presidential running-mate John Tyler.

#43*: William Henry Harrison

#42*: James Garfield (March 1881-September 1881)

Like Harrison, Garfield will be ‘assigned’ this spot (with a corresponding asterisk) rather than being ‘ranked’ here dishonorably. Less than four moths after assuming the Office of the Presidency, Garfield was shot by an angry political adversary. Although the bullet didn’t immediately claim his life, President Garfield would die of complications related to the attack two-and-a-half months later. And while he didn’t leave a lasting impression in the White House or on the role of the President, he did have a few things about him that are somewhat noteworthy: Garfield was the first ambidextrous President, and the only one who was an ordained minister. He was also a descendent of one of the original Pilgrims who traveled aboard The Mayflower. Aside from these fun facts, Garfield’s only act as the Executive was his approval of an extradition…not exactly textbook material to say the least.

Notable Quotations: “I am casting about me to find someone who will help to enliven the solitude which surrounds the presidency. The unfortunate incumbent of that office is the most isolated man in America.”

“A brave man is a man who dares to look the devil in the face and tell him he is a devil.”

#42*: James Garfield